Patch Drops - VELCRO COMPATIBLE PATCHES

🥃 RUM RUNNER RANDY The sacred keeper of light pours, heavy judgment, and calling out crimes against cocktail math. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop...

🌴 MOKU MOK The sacred guardian of empty calendars, full coolers, and seeing where the day aggressively refuses to go. Sized at 3x2 and hook & l...

🍹 MAI TAI MY GUY The sacred spirit of forgetting what day it is and being weirdly proud of it. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this re...

🌋 LAVA LARRY The sacred protector of bad pours, bold refills, and insisting this is definitely the last one. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compa...

🍌 CABANA BANANAThe sacred guardian of frozen drinks, slippery plans, and pool bar choices made with confidence and zero evidence. Sized at 3x2 an...

🛥️ BOATY MCTIKI The sacred guardian of floating around, raiding coolers, and contributing absolutely nothing but vibes. Sized at 3x2 and hook &...

👑 THE BIG KAHUNA-ISH The sacred guardian of acting in charge while absolutely winging the entire operation. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compat...

😴 POOLSIDE PETE The sacred protector of half-empty drinks, full-body chair naps, and pretending sunscreen counts as effort. Sized at 3x2 and hook &...

🌊 CHONGA BONGA The sacred guardian of sandy feet, questionable tan lines, and calling it “a lifestyle.” Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible...

😌🌿 STRUGGLE IS THE ENEMY, BUT WEED IS THE REMEDY“Struggle Is The Enemy, But Weed Is The Remedy” isn’t medical advice… but it’s working so far. Size...

🌿 GO GREEN“Go Green” can mean a lot of things… you’re just choosing the fun interpretation. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this remov...

🔥🌿 WEED IS BAD SO EVERY TIME I FIND SOME I BURN IT“Weed Is Bad So Every Time I Find Some I Burn It” is just doing your part… one session at a time....

🧠🌿 THAT’S WHAT I DO I SMOKE WEED AND I KNOW THINGS“That’s What I Do I Smoke Weed and I Know Things” sounds like a skillset… and honestly, it checks...

😏🌿 SORRY FOR MY BLUNTNESS THAT’S HOW I ROLL“Sorry for My Bluntness That’s How I Roll” is part apology… part warning. Sized at 3x2 and hook & lo...

😎🌿 SMOKE SOME WEED BRO“Smoke Some Weed Bro” is less advice… more like a universal solution. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this remov...

🤪🌿 I’M NOT AS THINK AS YOU STONED I AM“I’m Not as Think as You Stoned I Am” makes perfect sense… if you don’t think about it too hard. Sized at 3x2...

😇🌿 I SMOKE WEED BECAUSE PUNCHING PEOPLE IS FROWNED UPON“I Smoke Weed Because Punching People Is Frowned Upon” is all about making better choices… l...

😶🌫️ HIGH“High” keeps it minimal… because that’s all you’ve got the energy for right now. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this removabl...

✨🌿 GOLDEN MARIJUANA“Golden Marijuana” takes the usual leaf… and upgrades it to luxury status. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this rem...

🚫🌿 DON’T SMOKE SHIT WEED“Don’t Smoke Shit Weed” is less of a suggestion… more of a life rule. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, this rem...

🌿 DON’T PANIC, IT’S ORGANIC“Don’t Panic, It’s Organic” is the calm reassurance nobody asked for… but everyone appreciates. Sized at 3x2 and hook &a...

🔥 BAKED“Baked” keeps it simple… because overthinking is no longer on the agenda. Sized at 3x2 and hook-and-loop compatible, this removable patch sw...

🪪 AUTHORIZED DEALER“Authorized Dealer” sounds official… and honestly, you’re not correcting anyone. Sized at 3x2 and hook & loop compatible, th...

😅 AT LEAST IT’S NOT CRACK“At Least It’s Not Crack” is the kind of logic that feels questionable… but somehow still wins the argument. Sized at 3x2 ...