I'm Here Because You Broke Something - Removable Patch

Life Is Too Short To Pretend You Don't Like Cookies And Kinky Shit - Removable Patch

I Have One Nerve Left And You're Dry Humping It. - Removable Patch

Oooh ...This Calls For A Spreadsheet - Removable Patch

I Love My Hot Wife - Removable Patch

That's A Horrible Idea - What Time? - Removable Patch

I Licked It So It's Mine - Removable Patch

Cleverly Disguised As An Adult - Removable Patch

Stop Screaming... I'm Scared Too - Removable Patch

I Can't Be Held Responsible For What My Face Does When You Talk - Removable Patch

Not Slim Kinda Shady - Removable Patch

I Play With Saws - Removable Patch

I Hate People - Bears - Removable Patch

If I Pass Out Please Note My Time - Removable Patch

Currently Unsupervised - Removable Patch

I Came, I Saw, I Forgot What I Was Doing. I Retraced My Steps, Got Lost On The Way Back, And Now I Have No Idea What's Going On. - Removable Patch

I Void Warranties - Patch

I'm Thinking - Removable Patch

That's What - She - Removable Patch

How Strong Do You Like Your Coffee? I Want It To Show Up On A Drug Test - Removable Patch

Just So You Know, Nothing Accidentally Goes In Your Butt. Sincerely, The ER Staff - Removable Patch

When Things Seem Especially Rough Just Ask Yourself "Did I Just Shit My Pants Today?" And If The Answer Is No, You're Doing Alright. - Removable Patch

Nah - Rosa Parks 1955 - Removable Patch

The Voices May Not Be Real, But They Do Have Some Good Ideas- Removable Patch

I'm Billing You For This Conversation - Removable Patch

Science It's Like Magic But Real - Removable Patch

I Enjoy Romantic Walks To The Taco Truck - Removable Patch

Duct Tape Can't Fix Stupid. But It Can Muffle The Sound. - Removable Patch

No Member Of Metallica Has Ever Appeared On Sesame Street. Master Of Puppets, My Ass. - Removable Patch

Whoever Said There Is No Such Thing As A Stupid Question Really Needs To Come To My workplace For A Day... - Removable Patch

Every Once In A While Someone Amazing Comes Into Your Life. ...And Here I Am. You're Welcome. - Removable Patch

It's Not A Party Until The Wiener Comes Out - Removable Patch

Whatever I'm Getting Tacos - Removable Patch

I'm Ride Or Die Until About 9pm - Removable Patch

Bacon Is 73% Fat, And Very Salty. Me Too Bacon, Meee Too. - Removable Patch

I Welded - It Helded - Removable Patch

Attempted Murder - Removable Patch

Warning - Be Aware Of Wife - Husband Is Cool - Removable Patch

My Wife Said No - Removable Patch

Don't Grow Up It's A Trap - Removable Patch

I'm Only Here To Establish My Alibi - Removable Patch

There Is No Cloud. It's Just Someone Else's Computer - Removable Patch